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Before bedtime begins, I recommended they started saying to themselves, “I’m the parent here and I am in charge,” and then begin their bedtime ritual, which includes a declaration to Charlie: “From now on starting at we will begin our bedtime routine.This will include your bath, your teeth being brushed and one story.“Lily’s having fewer play dates because no one wants her around, and I get it,” says Sarah.“And she’s already getting in trouble in pre-school.” Disciplining young children can be challenging for parents, especially when their child’s behavior is especially inappropriate or obnoxious.Every time Karen tells her 5-year-old son Jayden it’s time to leave a friend’s house, he explodes, throwing his toys, screaming and kicking her.

But in the midst of all of these difficult years with your child, remember these two things: Bad behavior from children between the ages of two and six is completely normal—and as a parent, you have the ability to help your child learn how to begin to control him or herself.Joey gets the plane to play with while you watch your daughter.If she continues to be aggressive or physical she is removed from the situation to a safe environment where she will sit until she calms down.Kids of every age are smart and very adept at sensing indecision or wavering in parents.If a child thinks for one second that they can get away with an offense, they will try it—and if not called out by their parents for their indiscretion, will learn early on that they can work the system in their house!), but if you attempt an ongoing discussion with your four-year-old, you’ll find you won’t have a very alert audience for too long.My rule of thumb for attempting to change a young child’s behavior is to be “swift and safe.” By swift, I mean move in quickly to correct the behavior and place your child in an environment where he or she will be safe since young children have a tendency to lash out physically when angry or disciplined.His mother shows her wisdom in allowing him to pick and choose various things throughout the day that really have no impact on Trey’s well-being or safety.At breakfast time she’ll ask Trey, “Do you want cantaloupe or grapes today?(Note: If your young child has issues with anxiety when placed in an environment away from you, such as her bedroom, it may be helpful to put her in an area where she can still see and/or hear you.) Here’s an example: Three-year-old Charlotte has just smacked her best friend Joey in the head with a plastic plane they were arguing over.As Charlotte’s parent, your job is to move in swiftly, lowering your body to meet Charlotte’s eyes and stating: “We don’t hit,” while taking the plane away.

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